Christ Is Not My All

I have this problem (all good blog posts start out with a problem).  The problem happens during “worship” when I come to a lyric that encourages me to recognize God or Christ as my everything.  For most Christians, this is not problematic and seems quiet normal. For me, I can NOT honestly say that I give Christ my whole life.

I have a wife and kids. I give my life to them and not in the “we are Christians, we live to serve” sort of way. I give my life to my wife, because I love her deeply.  I would be crushed if I ever lost her. When she leaves town to visit relatives, I lose myself. I don’t eat, I don’t sleep. She is my sense of direction, my voice of reason, my complaint absorption pad, my life. 

My children are almost the same for me. I love them and adore them. I look forward to hearing their voices and sometimes even crave playing with them. I go to work every day to make sure they have a roof over their head and food in their stomachs.

I have heard it said before that I could do both: love my family while serving Christ. But that doesn’t feel honest to me. I don’t love my family because of Christ. I love other people because of Christ. I love my enemies and serve them because of Christ. I love democrats (and republicans) because of Christ. I love the abusers, the haters, the players, the pushers, the people who do me wrong, because of Christ.

So, when I get to those parts of the songs, I remain silent.